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Have You Read Your Scroll?


I have prepared myself for the possible and probable fallout over this post–both from my religious, non-religious, and somewhere-in-between followers.  But I sincerely hope that you are with me by the time you finish reading today’s post.

I don’t know about you, but I have always struggled with purpose.  Not that I don’t know who I am as much as what I am supposed to be doing on planet Earth.   If you believe that each of us is unique and was sent to this planet to utilize our gifts and talents for the sole purpose of bringing Heaven to Earth, then it follows that each of us have a special mission or contribution to humanity.  And that mission is our own personal riddle to solve.


There are usually clues to our life’s purpose such as natural talents, interests, and the families in which we are born.   If you are born the son of a king, then you probably have ruling and administration in your future.  If you are born to world-class Olympic track champions, I bet you could run for a living.  Some children show an amazing propensity for art, academics or athletics at a very young age.  Others have an incredible passions that lead them into their purpose.


And then there are the rest of us.


We are not Beethoven, Louis Pasteur or Steve Jobs.  We will never dance in the Russian Ballet no matter how many years of dance we took, nor will we start for the Dallas Cowboys despite our impressive high school football career.  We probably won’t win the Pulitzer Prize, nor will we probably be the one who discovers the cure for diabetes.


We are the majority of humanity who, I believe, are doing their darndest to live good lives, make a difference and hope that we did the best with the life and the resources given to us.


But I have always disagreed with just “doing your best”.


How can you do your best unless you precisely understand where you should be applying your time, energy and resources?


Life is too short to try and be the best at everything. Click To Tweet


On the flip side, life is also too short to settle for mediocrity.


There is a responsibility to find out what you were created for and do that precise thing to the very best of your ability.


Some of our purposes are more obvious than others.  I am a wife, a mother and a home school teacher.  The point and purpose of those roles are very clear, and I have learned not to dismiss their importance and impact in my search for “my purpose”.  These roles are very much a part of my life story, purpose and overall journey.


However, I still know that beyond sorting laundry, vacuuming up endless dog hair and cooking the next meal, there is still something resident within me that I am supposed to bring into this world.


I have always had an idea of what that is in a very vague sense.  It has nothing to do with being great, famous or making the history books as much as it does with the satisfaction of knowing that you tapped into the precise thing for which you were created.


Don’t you ever feel that way???  (someone please say yes…)


This dilemma of purpose, along with my many passions and over analyzing nature have led to many hours of pondering as I vacuumed the aforementioned dog hair.


And then… (are you sitting down?)


I recently heard about people who were traveling to Heaven and getting permission to read their scrolls.


What?!?!?  (…those were my exact sentiments, too.)


What scroll?  I have a scroll (scroll: another name for a fancy book) with my name on it?


Oh wait…  After my disbelief (and mild cynicism) settled, I did remember that one particular verse…


Your eyes saw my unformed substance; in your book were written, every one of them, the days that were formed for me, when as yet there was none of them.                      Psalm 139:16  (ESV)


Maybe these people weren’t crazy.  There is a book written for each of us that contains all of our days.   These people were simply reading a book from Heaven’s shelf.


It didn’t take me long to put two and two together…


1.) There are scrolls written for each us before we are born which contain the perfect plan that God ordained for our lives before we were sent to Earth.


2.) These scrolls are apparently available for public viewing because I am finding several different accounts of unrelated people being able to read them.


3.) Why would God write down the life purpose of every being he ever created?  What would be the purpose of penning all this information to paper if God is omniscient and knows everything?  The scrolls were obviously not written for His benefit.


I was excited and yet puzzled.  Surely this tiny minority of people of who gave an account of their trip to Heaven, the workings of the judicial system there and the scrolls were the special elect of God who somehow qualified for this prize trip into another realm.


How would I ever qualify for a library card to Heaven’s book room?


Let’s be real–I am not the poster child for sainthood.


My list of divine disqualifications run long and heavy.   A short, but not exhaustive, list includes: teenage rebel, teenage pregnancy, disastrous first marriage, eating disorder, poor decisions, financial issues, dishonesty, pride, arrogance, addictive behaviors, etc. etc. etc.


I seriously doubted that I could be one of those people who get to go into the courts of Heaven and have the privilege of reading their scroll.


Then a friend brought me a book out of nowhere that she thought I might be interested in reading.  It was titled The Courts of Heaven and was written by a guy named Robert Henderson.


And guess what…?


He talked about going into Heaven and getting to read your scroll.


Coincidence?  I think not.


I devoured that book and read another he had written on the subject.  It was apparent from his writing that any of God’s children could go into the courts of Heaven which is where the scrolls are located.


Let us therefore come boldly to the throne of grace, that we may obtain mercy and find grace to help in time of need.                                      Hebrews 4:18 NKJ


The throne of grace is a place we go to access mercy, grace and help–for me this would be much needed direction and strategy.


(gosh, I really hope you are still with me…)


I won’t fully go into everything that he wrote, as that revelation was given to him and not me.  I am by no means an authority on the subject, so I will do you a favor and not pretend that I am.  I will, however, list a link for his books as well as the other individuals whose accounts I have also studied in the next blog post.


So I finished the books.  And the questions began to swirl around me.  Did I believe what I just read, or was I going to toss it aside?  Was it really possible that I could experience what others had?  Could I really have the opportunity to read my scroll?


And furthermore…did I really want the responsibility of knowing the precise assignment for my life?


(I kind of already knew, but confirmation is a lovely thing.)


These questions were so prevalent, so demanding of my response, so consuming of my mental real estate, that I didn’t write a blog post for two months.  I had to make a decision: I would write this off as “not for me” or I would give it a go.


My ultimate conclusion was that I would at least try it.  I had nothing to lose, and I didn’t have to tell anyone if it didn’t work for me, right?  And if it did work, then I would consider sharing my experiences at the risk of losing a few friends along the way.


If you are still reading, then I hope you come back for the next post in which I will happily share my experiences in full detail.


But I think I have written enough for today.  I know this is a LOT to process, so I will give you the chance to do so.


Honestly…it’s difficult for me to share this because I know that some of you are going to reject what I am writing.  And as I am sharing from a place of complete vulnerability, your rejection will be painful.  Nevertheless, I feel as if I must write about my experience because I am a writer, and this is how I make sense of things.


Feel free to leave your comments, questions, concerns at the end of this post. 🙂


Please consider subscribing to my blog if you enjoy what you read…if your still here, that is.


And until next time… Peace. Love. & Truth.



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About Melody

truth-seeker. writer. wife. mom. papa's girl.

17 Replies

  1. Ali

    Looking forward to the next post! Appreciate your honesty and vulnerability and again personal challenge to see things differently!

    1. Thank you Ali for the encouragement. 🙂 I can’t wait to share the next post!

  2. Jim Davis

    I appreciate your openness and honesty about your experiences, thoughts, etc. What I’ve come to really love is how genuine you are. I hope and pray you never hold back on any revelation you receive. If someone can’t handle it, well, they just can’t. But I am guessing that most who read this are like me. Anxiously awaiting your next Blog Article. All the best to you and the family.

    1. Thank you Jim! I hope that all my followers feel the way you do. LOL! The next post should come out in a week or so.

  3. Amanda Wethington

    Looking forward to the next post!

  4. Michelle

    WoW! Exquisite writing, Melody! I agree with Ali & Jim & am anxiously awaiting to hear more!!! Thank you for being vulnerable & going before us in research & study to share your revelations!

    1. I am glad you enjoyed it…. I hope you enjoy part II as much. LOL!

  5. Thomas

    I love your honesty! Thank you for being vulnerable with all of us and trusting us to love you right where you are at. I appreciate that you allowed each of us to make our own decision by posting and not keeping this to yourself. I so thoroughly enjoy how you write and string your thoughts together. Your writing it beautiful. God bless you Melody! I am personally looking forward to your next post.

    1. That is exactly what I want–each one to form their own opinion. Thank you for the life-giving words!

  6. Cyndi

    Yes thank you you Mel for loving us enough to share this post. And yes I am very anxious to read next weeks post! You have an amazing gift of putting your thoughts into words. Loving and immensely enjoying your blog!!!

    1. Thank you Cyndi. I am glad you enjoyed it. 🙂

  7. Kenneth

    I look forward to your next post I have been missing them. I am often challenged with sharing what God is downloading to me through his spirit. Thanks for your dedication. Please keep writing.

    1. Thank you, and yes I will keep writing!

  8. Kathy

    Well? Where is the next blog? Hurry!

    1. Working on it! …LOL

  9. Erin Taylor

    I just purchased the first book! Last night I asked the Lord if this is something He wants me to pursue. I said, “I am just going to leave it at that, Lord.” I just flopped open my bible to Jeremiah chapter 36-38, all about scrolls. I took it as confirmation. Here we go! Thanks so much!

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